MICKLEOVER ROYALS 2-0 SWANWICK PENTRICH ROAD: light-hearted match report by The Mowdog...

Royals Emerge From the Gloom To Claim A Victory…

Mickleover Royals 2-0 Swanwick Pentrich Road

The floodlights went out almost as soon as they had been switched on at the Raygar Stadium and the word ‘conspiracy’ was heard: were the Mickleover Sports gremlins conspiring to postpone this game and preserve the playing surface? Hmm, how will we ever know? A break of twenty minutes, during which the Royals players prayed “Let there be light…” worked and the game began on a cold, dismal, slightly misty Mickleover evening, which reminded me of a Saturday morning in 1959, at Glebe Farm Park in Birmingham, where I played my very first school match for Hillstone. Aged 8+, in Year 4, I wore a huge black ‘2’ on a white patch, sewn to a green shirt, with long white sleeves and was told to stay just in front of the penalty-box, right side. I was nominally left-footed, but hours of practice in the garden with my right boot, because I thought there was something wrong with me for being left-footed, had meant that I could and can still kick equally well with both. It was cold. It was dismal. It was misty. I remember rubbing my hands together, agreeing with the also-redundant left-back that it was “Too cold…” and maybe clearing the ball a few times. I rubbed my hands together at Mickleover too but there had been more spectators present at that school match…

No Davy Hamson, Oli Buxton, Chris Martin, Shaun Roberts, or Nashan Wilson were present for Royals, and Peter Aliguma and Matt Savage were only on the bench, so if Swanwick could prevent home skipper Danny Martin from finding any space to create in, the visitors would surely have a chance to stifle their hosts. They almost managed it, for Royals contrived to waste a number of opportunities during a pallid first period, without being stretched defensively themselves and one of the Swanwick coaches seemed really pleased about the parity at half-time, when he spoke to the two nice visiting ladies in the grandstand, wrapped in blankets, like World War 1 nurses awaiting the next consignment of casualties from the trenches. Unfortunately for the visitors, a moment of class from home striker Steve O’Connell, then a disputed decision by a linesman, which led to a second goal by replacement Adam Birch, took the game beyond the plucky guests, for whom Sam Cox was particularly astute in midfield and defenders Rich Wall and Josh Dennis played with real aplomb.

Tossing-up with the lights on...

The first action of note came when a quick release by Royals found Louis Menson free at inside-right but the advancing fright of Swanwick ‘keeper Adam Jablonski saved the day, who blocked the nifty striker’s shot. Martin flung a corner and then a centre over from the right, after the smiling Ash Foster had initially struck a low cross into the heart of the visitors’ defence to win the flag-kick. The corner was headed clear but the second delivery caused a little more difficulty for the tall Swanwick central defenders. O’Connell retrieved a loose ball well and fed Brandon Gwinnutt, surely wasted wide on the right for Mickleover, where he received scant service, but on this occasion he tricked his way to the byeline, squared a pass for Foster to strike but the midfielder’s effort at goal was badly sliced and miscued to his utter dismay. He even stopped smiling. Although little had been seen of the visitors, Royals were certainly not dominating, even though some pressure had been exerted upon the guests’ penalty-area and soon, Swanwick won a free-kick, 28 yards or so from goal, which burly central striker Shane Buckerfield shaped to shoot from. He took a long run-up, as if he was hoping for a call-up as a fast bowler to England’s current cricket tour and his effort was really good but rose just too high, with home goalie Ash Warner flying and the visiting coaches yelling for a corner. They didn’t get one.

Jablonski was having trouble with his goal-kicks, two of which flew out of play over the left touchline, but in truth, half-an-hour had passed and the match hadn’t risen above the mundane, with Cox looking bright for Swanwick but Martin’s possession severely limited. Gwinnett then actually managed to find the ball on the right but O’Connell couldn’t get purchase on his shot from the midfielder’s delivery. Another poor kick by Jablonski led to the often impressive Ryan Thompson sending O’Connell clear at inside-right but the big forward’s attempted chip-shot went totally awry, failing to lift much and the ‘keeper caught the ball above his head. Jablonski caught a Menson header, following passes between Thompson and Gwinnutt on the right but when Gwinnutt surrendered possession, Buckerfield ran forth for the guests, only to attempt a pass when his lusty right boot might have hammered a decent shot at goal instead. 

At the opposite end, a brilliant, signature, cross-field pass to the left by Martin freed Joe Brockley to bear down on goal from an angle but Jablonski saved the ensuing shot with his feet. Brockley’s corner came to nought but Swanwick soon won a throw on the left and Buckerfield set up left-winger Matt Phillips for a shot, which sailed sadly into the mist. Menson, like a Louis-in-the-6-yard-box then beat the leaping Jablonski in the air at the near post, when another Brockley corner swerved in but the header was off target, past the left upright. Menson then drove a cross-shot from the left wide of the target, following a great pass by left-back Kieran Lynch, before O’Connell cut in from the right and made a measured pass to Martin but the skipper’s drive from distance flew wide of the left post too. A good release by Brockley set O’Connell running at inside-left and he veered past the marauding Jablonski on the left edge of the penalty-box but shot from a tough angle and his effort was disappointingly off target.

Brockley drove a shot too high from O’Connell’s feed, Menson had a shot blocked for a left-wing corner, which Jablonski beat away like it was a particularly large and unpleasant moth, but when Foster then won possession, his effort too, was well wide of the left upright. The interval arrived, the few spectators tended to go and find hot drinks, I shoved my hands in my pockets and wondered about mugging the two ladies in the grandstand and nicking their blankets.

Immediately after the break, Phillips passed to Cox for Swanwick but his effort was wasteful, then Martin passed a free-kick right for Thompson to deliver a smart cross but O’Connell challenged Jablonski and the tall striker was deemed to have fouled the goalie, although the ball had dropped well wide of the goal-frame anyway. Kieran Lynch unusually lost possession for the hosts but when right-sided attacker Mark Green raced clear, the move was halted by an offside flag. Adam Gross was warned for a gross foul on Foster, who was running towards the right but it was a Cox free-kick from the right for the visitors, which momentarily threatened the home goal. This was the first of several really good decisions by the referee (yes, praise indeed…) for his use of the advantage rule, then bringing play back to give the aggrieved team a deserved free-kick, if the ‘play-on’ didn’t offer any advantage at all. Cox’s wide and deep kick dropped in front of Warner and he lost the ball but the visitors failed to capitalise. Warner’s next involvement was to display his back-court beach volleyball prowess, with a two-fisted thump from another deep Cox free-kick.

Swanwick forward Dean Owen had taken a knock during the first-half and he was replaced by Ash Buxton, only for the visitors to go a goal behind immediately. A quick ball forward was nudged on by Menson and O’Connell swept into possession at inside-right, slamming a fine drive across the despairing dive of Jablonski and the ball bounced into the left corner of the net. A fine finish, which highlighted Mickleover’s lesser-quality first-half efforts at goal…

Not a gloomy celebration, but one in gloom...

Ash Lynch, who performed steadily alongside the mean, lean Jordan Simpson in the home defence, reached Blockley’s next left-side corner with a downward header but Jablonski watched it well and tipped the ball over his crossbar. Adam Birch replaced Gwinnutt for the guests, Wall was hurt making a brilliant tackle on the speeding Menson inside his 18 yard box, before Jablonski beat O’Connell to Birch’s right-flank centre, following neat approach play by Mickleover, who appeared to be more settled with the lead, albeit a slender one. Guy Wilding surprisingly replaced Buckerfield for the guests but again, straight after a substitution, the visitors conceded a goal. This time, they were attacking from a short free-kick and Foster defended well for Royals, chased the ball towards the left touchline and hacked the ball forward to Menson, who in turn fed O’Connell; he switched play well and fed the onside Birch on the right-flank. Birch ran on and set himself for a right-foot shot from 19 yards, which seemed measured but the ball flew off Jablonski’s left arm and into the net. The visiting coaches were certain that the ball had crossed the touchline before the move had advanced and the linesman was admonished thus: “Gosh, old chap, was the ball not out?”

Birch sensibly comes over to the near side of the pitch, so that his goal celebration can be seen...

Simeon Lawrence replaced home skipper Martin, who left the field for a fag and a read of the ‘paper and Brockley received the captain’s armband, which pleased The Bodging… The linesman who hadn’t yet been admonished much missed Birch being offside, as Royals broke again, then Josh Gregory replaced O’Connell for the hosts and Phil Gregory replaced the ailing Wall for the guests. A third goal was not conceded by the visitors after the substitution though… Simpson was warned for a rough foul, with stand-in skipper Brockley listening in to the telling-off by the official but had Oli Buxton and Chris Martin been present too, there would have been two Lynches, two Buxtons, two Martins and two Gregorys on view… Hmm, but only one Aliguma… After all, there IS only one Aliguma… (You can sing that in the car…) Menson, Gregory and Foster worked an opening for a Brockley shot, which drifted well wide, Menson headed a Brockley corner, unchallenged, wastefully over the crossbar from 3 yards, Lawrence’s angled right-side free-kick was fumbled and then regained by Jabloski at his near post, Brockley then shot straight at the Swanwick goalie from 21 yards and finally Menson made a late wriggling run but shot weakly and well wide of the right upright from 18 yards. 

And that was that. The three points for Royals were deserved but that was a tough display by Swanwick, who were always in with a chance of sneaking a goal, although the fierce, ferocious face of Simpson would not have been nice to witness had Mickleover conceded… I drove home with stiff fingers, which eventually warmed up and allowed me to pick my nose, possibly just after Alrewas on the A38, and then hot strong tea, a mince pie and a bowl of Weetabix would serve me well before a restless night…

It’s what I do…

Teams:

Mickleover Royals:  Ash Warner, Ryan Thompson, Kieran Lynch; Jordan Simpson, Ash Lynch, Danny Martin (Capt); Brandon Gwinnutt, Ash Foster, Louis Menson, Steve O’Connell, Joe Brockley.

Subs: Josh Gregory, Peter Aliguma, Adam Birch, Simeon Lawrence, Matt Savage.

Swanwick Pentrich Road:  Adam Jablonski, Josh Smith, Adam Gross; Ian Milson, Josh Dennis, Rich Wall; Mark Green, Dean Owen, Shane Buckerfield, Sam Cox, Matt Phillips.

Subs: Guy Wilding, Ash Buxton, Phil Gregory.