FAIRFIELD VILLA 1-3 COVENTRY UNITED: light-hearted match report by THE MOWDOG... (Not the Mowcat, Mr Maguire...)

Hungover Coventry Finally Emerge From Stupor…

Fairfield Villa 1-3 Coventry United

Missing a number of regulars, such as ‘keepers Connor, Mitchell and Fox, defenders Moudime (on the bench), Hutchcox (injured), Kool Ntim (probably singing with his Gang) and the hurt Whailing, plus midfielder Mussa (on the bench), along with absent forwards Kelly, Maguire and top scorers Stokes and Blake, United looked jaded and lacking creativity before the break, as the stern, stubborn Villa defence denied their guests with little real anguish. The hosts looked troublesome on a few occasions on the break, scoring with a clever lob, striking the crossbar and missing another lob, as well as causing a couple of tense moments of panic in the United penalty-area. Weak finishing by Coventry, despite a good proportion of possession, took them to the interval with little prospect of taking even a point from the encounter but after half-time, Villa were strangled by the emergence of a serpent, as The Cage rattled and United began to set about their hosts, scoring three times and missing a few other decent chances for good measure. Fairfield really struggled to assert themselves as slight drizzle cooled the afternoon and in truth, Coventry ‘keeper Said Mohammed was rarely brought into more action than fielding the ball. The best moment of the game happened late on when two-goal United wide-man Sean Kavanagh nutmegged another player: his colleague Brian Ndlovu. You just couldn’t make that up… 

The home skipper begs a linesman to lend him his ball...

A fairly lively start to the game with the typically swashbuckling United skipper Chris Cox well involved, led to a drive by Josh O’Grady, which was off target past the right post from distance. Then I noticed the linesman on the Villa offensive right, for he had positioned himself a distance behind the ‘last player’, which made me wonder how the heck he would be able to give an informed offside decision from that kind of angle and indeed, I don’t recall any given by that errant flagman at all. Anyhow, from nothing, a long ball forward by Villa released left-sided attacker Ellis Blakemore and he gleefully lobbed the huge frame of Mohammed from just outside the penalty-box. 1-0 and all United could offer was a pass from Jayden Rickhuss, actually starting in this game, to Nathan Ley, also starting this game, at right-back, whose punt rose vertically, dropped in front of home goalie Ryan Taylor and bounced only just over the crossbar. 

Not a headed clearance by Prinzel but his toe injury has caused him to leap in agony...

Blakemore has opened the scoring for Villa...

Regular Villa goalscorer Connor Collins, always lively and confident, managed to fasten onto a loose ball at inside-left and his hooked 25 yard volley crashed onto Mohammed’s crossbar, with the ‘keeper probably wondering why he had agreed to play in this game. Taylor then juggled a corner from O’Grady, like he was unable to hang onto his shampooed dog but was somehow awarded a goal-kick as the ball rolled out of play, whereas Mohammed caught a right-wing centre from Fairfield and then held onto the ball again, as Rob Prinzel’s vertical slice put his team under momentary pressure. Incredibly, from a Coventry corner, Villa broke superbly again, Blakemore exchanged passes with Collins, who waited for his colleague’s run and released a great feed but this time, although clear of Ley and Prinzel again, Blakemore lifted his lob too high. When Dan Lucas was baulked and couldn’t get his shot away for the visitors, O’Grady’s 22 yard free-kick just about cleared the defensive wall but dropped miserably wide of the right stick.

Cox up really high, if you excuse the expression...

Kavanagh had rarely been involved in the game thus far but managed a deflected shot, before Prinzel’s Scottish Kelpie, also known as a sore toe, forced him off the pitch, encouraging Cox to drop into defence and thus pressed the rested Gift Mussa into action and after a few moments of hesitancy, the young 12 year old midfielder (only joking, Harry…) seemed to take on the mantle of a World War 1 infantryman bent on winning the Victoria Cross for bravery, foolhardiness and sheer selfless marauding. He was relentless. The unsettled Cagemen were making little attacking progress though and were worried by Collins and Blakemore on a few occasions but the lack-lustre performance must have concerned manager Edwin ‘Jimmy’ Greaves. Blakemore curled in a left-side free-kick, no more than neck-high and as everybody, I mean EVERYbody, stood to admire his delivery, Mohammed suddenly realised that the effort might steal in at the right upright. He made a panic move, the ball rolled wide and it only remained in the half for Cox to make a fine tackle as a cross was delivered from the right by Ryan Molesworth and for home ‘keeper Taylor to make a meal of another O’Grady corner with a questionable punch. 

Did Edwin take his team to the chapel for prayers and Divine Intervention at the break?

2nd half and changes will happen...

Neither goalie looked at all comfortable with crosses during this game, in truth but certainly United, after being honoured by their hosts with applause onto the pitch before the match began, were not performing as Champions but how that was to change after the interval, as the 15 year old Gift ‘Massive’ Mussa (only joking, Harry…) began to exert his influence, O’Grady began to mesmerise like Mr Lolly the children’s party magician and Cox’s experience and downright will to win came to the fore. Villa capitulated.

After Mohammed fumbled a right-side corner out for another right-side corner, United struck with a clinical and well taken equaliser by Kavanagh, who looked like a different player after the break, as if he’d been force-fed six Shredded Wheat biscuits by his manager. Neat play on the left by Rickhuss led to a pass into the penalty-box, Kavanagh’s body-swerve and dummy left a defender grounded and the winger rapped a low 12 yard drive into the bottom right corner of the net. It was as easy as that and suddenly, Fairfield were reeling. 

1-1 and Kavanagh has restored parity...

However, if Molesworth’s shot hadn’t been as tame as Reginald Molehusband’s parking in a famous TV advert, Coventry could easily have fallen behind again soon afterwards, courtesy of a bad kick by Mohammed but the goalie recovered as Molesworth’s shot at an empty net sailed forward with no pace and the ‘keeper clung onto the ball in sheer relief. United threatened again and from O’Grady’s free-kick, Lucas’ close range shot was really well saved, low, by Taylor and Kavanagh’s rebound effort was blocked on the goal-line by Smith, as United turned the screw and Villa were forced to defend stoutly, with Ben Smith and Lewis Cosgrove doing some fine work at times.

Ndlovu then set Mussa galloping into the inside-right channel and the wily 17 year old midfielder (only joking, Harry…) scored from an angle with an incisive finish across the fallen Taylor, the ball skidding into the bottom left corner of the net.

Mussa (aged 11) has scored for The Cage: 1-2 now...

The rather elegant Brian Ndlovu poses for a photograph...
Wonder what Sean Kavanagh is thinking?

Tricky O'Grady (background) wonders why Brian Ndlovu is shaking hands with somebody who isn't actually there...

O’Grady ran centrally and unleashed a far better drive than his earlier free-kick and his 25 yarder was spectacularly turned over the goal-frame by the gymnastic Taylor. O’Grady’s subsequent corner was headed back across goal by the towering Cox and although Rickhuss, on the byeline, did well to get in a header, it dropped onto the roof of the net. Mussa, in another midfield scrap, won the ball, was clattered, but wrongly penalised, before Rickhuss drove a 25 yard shot too high and a 23 yard effort low at goal, which Taylor fell right for and held at the second attempt near a post. Cosgrove did really well to clear the ball, following a typically clever run to the right byeline by Tricky O’Grady, then Molesworth was replaced by Villa’s Joel Reilly. Moudime replaced Ley for The Cagemen but it was Collins who did well to get in a shot for Fairfield and his 25 yard left-footer was only a few yards past the right upright, with Mohammed scampering across. 

O’Grady then set off on another Magical Mystery Tour along the right flank, cut inside, his release was hacked against a fellow defender by Villa’s Cosgrove and there was the loitering Kavanagh to fire home from 10 yards to complete the scoring and also a remarkable change of fortune for both outfits. I believe Edwin Greaves smiled at this point, exercised his disco arms for the next Pips tour with Gladys Knight and Villa, devastated, were beaten. 

1-3 and Kavanagh again...

Matt Collins and Tom Cunningham replaced Villa’s Oli Booth and Chris Lowe, before Ndlovu, by now looking less contained by the home defence, released O’Grady on the right again, the ensuing cross fell onto the criminally unmarked Kavanagh’s head at the far post but with the words ‘hat’ and ‘trick’ in his mind, the winger headed well off target. Kavanagh punished not himself, but Ndlovu, by nutmegging him, hilariously, before a Villa corner led to a shot by Jak Albutt but with the ball possibly heading for the outside of the left upright, Kavanagh sensibly hacked the ball off the goal-line, then raced upfield to join a counter attack, in which Ndlovu lost possession. A deflected free-kick shot by Albutt was chased along the byeline by Mohammed but he chose to kick it away, the corner came to nought and it only remained for the 18/19 year old Mussa (no, really, Harry…) and O’Grady to light up the final moments of this useful victory for The Cagemen.

Moudime lies hurt, but Chris Cox looks SO concerned...

First, after a shot by Villa’s McGlen drifted off target, Mussa won possession and simply rampaged forward, seemingly losing the ball, winning it back, losing it again and regaining it; it was like he was stumbling through an assault course which was littered with clinging, stinging nettles but just as he reached the edge of the penalty-area, a strong tackle relieved him of the ball. Finally, O’Grady attempted a new trick, following neat work by substitute Gilbert Kugbe-Dzisam, who had replaced Rickhuss, which was called ‘Beat Everybody’. He did so, with some remarkable skills, which surely must have bamboozled himself too on such an uneven surface, but after beating Smith and goalie Taylor fluently, with Kavanagh waiting for a simple square pass to complete his trio of goals, the Wizard’s wand waved again and Tricky O’Grady’s last spell, a drag-back, left Smith and Taylor crumpled like hypnotised opponents in a Harlem Globetrotters show, only for the Wizard’s shot at goal to be hacked out by the desperate Cosgrove. Sadly, Moudime was badly hurt and missed the final 10 minutes or so of the match, being carried away on someone’s back like he’d been pillaged by an invading Viking thane. Our thoughts are with you, Monsieur…

The helpless Moudime is captured by a pillaging Viking raider...
"He'll do..." says Ragnar Lodbrok's daughter... 

Game over, I was shocked at the scoreline, following that dreadful first period by the guests, but a word for Jamie Coleman: ‘Splendid…’ He encouraged Ley through the opening half, frowned a lot, yelled more and some of his profanities were totally justified at some tired, woeful colleagues, like: “Come on, chaps! We are not doing so well today! Liven up, good fellows!” He was the anchor. Cox was, er, the cox, O’Grady was the pilot and Mussa (just still a teenager, Harry…) was the complete engine-room crew, as the ship-shape, unexcitable Kavanagh fired the telling shots from the poop-deck. Lucas was simply a presence and Ben Vallance was, er, Ben Vallance. For the hosts, Collins was an obvious threat, although dulled by Coleman, Blakemore took his goal well and midfielder Jamie Hatfield, of Fairfield, always looked to create. Smith and Cosgrove were really effective though. 

I drove back to Solihull stunned by Bournemouth’s Championship success… Howe did Eddie do that? Passing. Attacking. Do I not like that…

It’s what Coventry United do…