STUDLEY 0-3 COVENTRY UNITED: FULL MATCH REPORT BY THE MOWDOG...

Joy of Cagemen Released In the Beehive, As Promoted Coventry United Win Again…

Studley 0-3 Coventry United

This fairly low-key encounter was won by United without fuss or extreme thrills, but by three smart, clinical finishes at the right times at a rain-affected Studley Beehive. Senior players netted the goals: Josh O’Grady’s heads-up free-kick, Josh ‘Praise Me’ Blake’s rampant shot and Chris ‘Captain’ Cox’s demonstrative volley punished an often neat Studley, for whom right-back Gary Turner starred and ex-Cageman Dan Stokes displayed the odd neat touch. By half-time, with Bromsgrove’s Rouslers a goal down to Cadbury Athletic, the destination of the title was inevitable and Coventry returned to the dressing-rooms knowing it was their day. Certainly United’s central defender Jamie Coleman, all tattoos and no real skin, was impressive on the day and he, his colleagues and the staff really let themselves go in a show of unrivalled craziness at the end of the 90 minutes. The end of season juggernaut of Coventry victories had left their challengers wanting and it was fitting that the celebrations took place in the pre-deluge sunshine at Studley, if only for the pictorial record…

TOSSING AT THE BEEHIVE...

An early United attack saw an O’Grady shot deflected, before Rich Blythe and Tommy Glasscoe intervened and Cox’s low drive struck home defender Gary Joynes and flew behind for a right-side corner. O’Grady’s flag-kick curled into the side-netting, although he believed that ‘keeper Brendon Bunn’s fists had deflected it there. The referee didn’t. Stokes lashed an angled effort well over the Coventry goal-frame in a rare Studley attack but to be fair, home striker Charlie Wilson worked really hard for his team throughout. Rob Prinzel freed Cox for a midfield run but the skipper was unable to feed the supporting O’Grady, before Gift ‘Only 14’ Mussa, on the fringes of the game for much of the time, was fouled outside the Studley penalty-box. O’Grady cleverly asked the referee if he could take the 27 yard free-kick quickly, the official agreed and Tricky’s clipped left-footer rose over the home defence, nudged off the right upright past a motionless Brendon Bunn and into the net.

O'GRADY HAS A PROBLEM WITH HIS BALLS...

"CAN I TAKE THIS FREE-KICK QUICKLY PLEASE REF, CUZ IT'LL MAKE THAT DEFENDER HOPPING MAD..."

IT WENT IN, TOO...

0-1...

TRICKYBEARD HAS SCORED...

Glasscoe was then cautioned for United, possibly for returning to the field of play without permission following an injury, although I could be wrong. Neat passing by Studley’s Robbie Bunn and Joe Knight offered skipper Danny Byford a shot at goal, which he fluffed, before a sliced kick by Pierre Moudime, who had not started too confidently for the guests, allowed Robbie Bunn to set up Knight for a curling effort from 25 yards, inside-left, which Rich ‘Rainbow-Wear’ Morris tipped over his crossbar. Prinzel’s unwise and wild challenge on Turner earned him a booking, then some abject Coventry play offered Kiel Mullen a chance to deliver a cross from the left, which Morris dealt with in rather an unusual manner, shoving it over his crossbar like he was pushing some grass cuttings over his garden fence into a neighbour’s garden.

TURNER (2): FINE GAME FOR STUDLEY...

PIERRE MOUDIME: "IL Y A UN BLAIREAU DANS MON SAC..."

THE DEFENDER HAS NO IDEA WHERE O'GRADY IS GOING.
NOR DOES O'GRADY...

Morris’ fisted punch from Mullen’s corner dropped for Stokes, who was unmarked 20 yards out, which Coleman had spotted and indicated to his team-mates but nobody had moved to the United old-boy but his drive was off target anyway. Moudime was getting more success on the right by this time and when he forced his way past challenges, like he was hunting wild boar in a French forest, his low cross flew straight to Brendon Bunn, yet O’Grady was unmarked and screaming with beard aflame, just 10 yards out. A clearance by Prinzel to free Blake on the left, should really have brought a second goal, for despite Prinzel’s support, Blake’s clip across goal was aimed for O’Grady, whose touch deserted him. It remained only for Mullen to waste a hopeful shot for Studley and spectators returned to the pavilion for beer and lager. 

MOUDIME HAS QUITE FORGOTTEN HOW TO BEND HIS RIGHT LEG...

Moudime made early second-half runs for Coventry, Cox flicked the ball on for O’Grady but nothing emerged from the attack, Wilson continued to work strongly in the home attack and Stokes remained largely tidy in possession. Indeed, as Stokes moved forward for Studley, Burgess interceded, Prinzel picked up the ball, released it out left for O’Grady and suddenly, the hosts were badly stretched. O’Grady simply shoved a pass inside for the rampaging Blake and he lifted the ball pleasingly on the run over the advancing goalkeeper and the visitors were already tasting bubbly.

BLAKE, THE DRAMA-QUEEN, HAS COLLAPSED IN JOY...

0-2...

GAME OVER, SEASON RESOLVED...

Wilson was unable to control a thoughtful Turner pass, a loose Prinzel pass allowed Robbie Bun a run and shot, which Morris fell forward for and took off his chest, before hesitation in the home defence allowed Cox a shooting chance from 28 yards but this flew well wide. Declan Print replaced Stokes for Studley but almost immediately, Coventry struck again. Cox was released by Blythe’s astute pass from centre to left and the man in the armband controlled the ball and volleyed it after the bounce hard and low past the helpless Brendon Bunn.

0-3...

OMG: DID COXY FORGET THE DEODORANT?

NO, IT'S FINE, HE REMEMBERED AFTER ALL.
BUT A SCHOOLBOY HAS RUSHED ONTO THE PITCH, HE THINKS IT'S ALL OVER...
IT IS NOW.

With the game at 0-3, replacements caused some general deterioration in the encounter; Martin Hutchcox replaced Moudime for United, Vagnol Kediambiko appeared for Wilson, surprisingly, Matt Brown substituted for Mussa and soon, home central defender Orrin Pendley, whose sheer determination had shone through for Studley, was cautioned for a foul on Blake. United’s Brian Ndlovu replaced Blake soon afterwards and Charlie Evans appeared in place of Mullen for the hosts but with so many changes being made, the game was stumbling to an end like an inebriated clubber on a driftwood-strewn beach. Evans could gather no power behind his header from Kediambiko’s right-side centre, a fine Turner pass outside Coleman freed Kediambiko to run at inside-right but his left-footer trickled past the left upright, before O’Grady attacked on the Coventry right but Joynes stopped Blythe from scoring. Joynes then blocked a right-flank delivery from O’Grady, Morris saved an angled Evans shot, although the replacement was offside and in a decent finish by the hosts, the tireless Byford fed Print for a shot, which drifted well off target.

HARRY: "LET'S TALK ABOUT THE REFERENDUM, MATT..."
"BUGGER OFF HARRY..."

HELLO BRIAN...

BEASTS IN MAN-MASKS...

...& MINUS THE MASKS...

The game ended, the celebrations began, the Shield was awarded, alcohol flew through the Studley air and the Coventry United players sucked in the acclaim… They had stifled the opposition, with Callum Burgess and Coleman immovable in defence, with Blythe a presence in midfield and despite the lack of width on many occasions, the job got done…

THE INJURED BEN VALLANCE: SURELY A CENTRAL-DEFENDER OF THE FUTURE? SORRY, MATE...

It’s what they do.

TEAMS:

STUDLEY:

Brendon Bunn, Gary Turner, Matt Edwards, Danny Byford (Capt), Orrin Pendley, Gary Joynes, Dan Stokes, Robbie Bunn, Charlie Wilson, Joe Knight, Kiel Mullen.

SUBS:

Declan Print, Vagnol Kediambiko, Charlie Evans, Ash Bunn.

COVENTRY UNITED:

Rich Morris, Pierre Moudime, Tommy Glasscoe, Rob Prinzel, Callum Burgess, Jamie Coleman, Rich Blythe, Chris Cox (Capt), Josh Blake, Josh O’Grady, Gift Mussa.

SUBS:

Martin Hutchcox, Matt Brown, Muzi Nduna, Brian Ndlovu, Joe Connor (gk).