STAPENHILL 1-0 AFC COVENTRY RANGERS: A MATCH REPORT BY THE MOWDOG, WITH NEW IMAGES...

 Rangers Deserve Better As Own-Goal Divides Teams…

Stapenhill 1-0 AFC Coventry Rangers

The overall impression…

RATHER A LOT OF LOOSE HANDS HERE...

In a game of very few chances, the Swans won this pre-season match courtesy of one of those kinds of own-goals which no matter how many times you look at them on a video clip, you can never really explain the reasons for the goal being scored at all. 

A speculative free-kick by a trialist (wearing 5), a rush by a forward, who was covered by a defender, a goalie hesitant in stepping forth and suddenly all three players were in a fairly close triangle. The striker, Swans’ Joe Payne missed the ball, which then inadvertently nudged off the Rangers’ skipper Curtis Cutts and diverted over the partly crouching ‘keeper Dale O’Donnell’s shoulder and tamely into the net…

MUTED SWANS' CELEBRATION...
(GET IT? MUTE SWANS...)

I think I’ll watch it again…

Interesting that Joe Payne was also the name of a footballer who scored 10 goals in a game v Bristol Rovers on 13th April 1936, which was won 12-0. Quite a record…

 Cutts was immense for Coventry, the kind of battlefield tank the Russians might just retreat from in Ukraine. If he continues his solid, footballing, shit brick-house form, Rangers might just be an interesting crew to watch in Midland League 2 during the coming season. He was involved in a bizarre offside decision too, which was totally hilarious. He left his marker and ran forward to reach the bounce of a Stapenhill clearance but didn’t get there in time and the ball sprang up off the hard ground to fly way over his head. The Swans’ forward must have been well pleased as he moved towards the ball, only for an assistant’s flag to rule him offside…

Maybe don’t try that one again, Curt?

CHESTERS (LEFT): "YOU CALL THOSE PRESS-UPS?"

Rangers were combative, their players pressed Stapenhill until the final moments, despite the terribly hot weather and also missed a few chances to score. Oddly, Stapenhill’s offense stuttered more than Coventry’s, meaning that all four goaltenders were often rather redundant.

LANSDOWNE: RIGHTLY STICKING CLOSE TO FARRELL...

Yes, both teams were missing players who will be starters when the season opens but in truth, Rangers looked the more organised and effective team on the day, despite the efforts of Swans’ skipper James Frost, central defender Harry Lansdowne and busy midfielder Tommy Hill. Wide-forward Cam Steele and striker Payne received precious little good service from midfield, although trialist 3 made several decent overlapping rushes.

FAGBEMI: "HE'S ONE OF THE BROTHERS, ALL WITH THE SURNAME 'TRIALIST'. ODD, THAT..."

Goal attempts…

Two free-kicks resulted in saves. First, Rangers’ Fola ‘Dunkin’ Fagbemi’s 24 yard shot was comfortably turned over his crossbar by home custodian Paul Hollis, then Swans’ number 10, Scott Staniland drove in a good effort too, which was well pushed around the base of his left upright by the sprawling O’Donnell.

FAGBEMI: "THAT'S MY DUNKIN' ARM YOU'VE HIT, YOU IDIOT..."

The best chance of a second goal in the contest fell to Rangers’ Owen Wassall, whose unchallenged header from Fagbemi’s right-side centre struck the home crossbar. He rued that miss and he stood in disbelief with his hands at his head…

Wily Rangers’ striker Connoll Farrell endured a quiet game and skied two chances in the opening period, then fatally seemed to try to switch the ball to his left boot at 18 yards when running towards goal, which allowed the home defence to close him down and even claim a goal-kick…

TRIALIST: "LOOK, THERE'S A RED KITE!"
FARRELL (IN BLUE): "NAH, THAT'S A BUZZARD..."

Home trialist 7 nodded a far post header from a Steele centre well off target but several other efforts from downtown by both teams were rather wayward. 

The final words…

Looking at the encounter from an independent point of view, the Swans were likely relieved not to concede a goal but in some ways, having a keen, competitive match so early in the pre-season must have been a bonus for them, as well as winning it…

PERKINS: "I THOUGHT IT WAS YOUR WRIST THAT'S INJURED, NOT YOUR HEAD?"

Lively displays by Rangers’ young full-back Corey Perkins, also Owen Suddick and Wassall were backed up by Phil Chesters’ calmness alongside the bulldozing Cutts. The often sprightly threats of Fagbemi were watchable but most of all, the all round performance of midfielder Dan Monger was memorable.

WASSALL ATTEMPTS TO PULL THE REF'S JERSEY OUTSIDE HIS SHORTS TO GIVE HIM A MORE FASHIONABLE LOOK...

The wiry playmaker looked the most creative player on view, along with the Swans’ Hill and although Monger would be irritated by one wayward shot and a couple of ineffective passes, his effort and ability could not be faulted.

It was good to see Liam Doyle get 45 minutes in for Rangers and he made some decent contributions from the offensive left. Subsequently though, despite the heat, both teams should take much from the contest in their quests to find the best tactical formations for their long Midland League seasons ahead.

FAGBEMI'S BOOTS TURN RED WHEN HE'S ANNOYED AT BEING FOULED...

Thanks to the Swans’ secretary for sending me some names of players, actually during a drinks break and I was then shocked to find that he was only sitting in the shaded grandstand just behind where I stood to film the game… 

THE REF NICKS A BALL AT THE END...

Also, thanks to the lady at the entrance gate for the interesting chat about a topic concerning one of my daughters. I have passed on her advice…

SQUADS:

STAPENHILL:

PAUL HOLLIS (GK), JAMES FROST (CAPT), HARRY LANSDOWNE, CHARLIE RUMIN, TOMMY HILL, JOE PAYNE, SCOTT STANILAND., CAMERON STEELE, PLUS A NUMBER OF TRIALISTS…

AFC COVENTRY RANGERS:

DALE O’DONNELL (GK), COREY PERKINS, OWEN SUDDICK, KIERAN MCANDREWS, PHIL CHESTERS, CURTIS CUTTS (CAPT), FOLA FAGBEMI, DAN MONGER, CONNOLL FARRELL, OWEN WASSALL, JOSH BIRD, LIAM DOYLE, DEMI ADEISRAEL, JOE MCCREATH, LOZ WOODROFFE (IS THAT RIGHT?), TYLER HAWTHORN (GK).