COVENTRY UNITED 10-0 COVENTRY COPSEWOOD: light-hearted match report by THE MOWDOG...

Luckless Copsewood Caned By Ruthless Cagemen …

Coventry United 10-0 Coventry Copsewood

I guess wingers are often fast, taking on troubled and concerned full-backs who have to turn before gaining acceleration, whilst other wide-players lack that effective pace, making up for it with clever footwork, twisting, turning and outrageous balance. They invite an unwise challenge and often, their extreme body positions result in being easily knocked off balance, hence winning what appear to be ‘soft’ free-kicks. Cageman Josh O’Grady is not a speedster but a tricky customer if ever there was one and he was fouled three times in the opening stages against Copsewood by guest left-back Stuart Adamson, who was warned about the first, cautioned after the second and thus dismissed for the third. This left the plucky visitors a man light for a long time and as their own offensive efforts came to nought, thanks to three fine saves by home goalie Rich Morris, their defence was punctured ten times by a rampant United, who got stronger and more lethal as the game ticked on. O’Grady tested the Copses to the limit and although defenders knew when Tricky was going to turn inside, or possibly outside, they prepared for the situations, imitated his moves and yet still O’Grady mugged them too often. It was uncanny, but fascinating to witness.

The Shed of Cold Comfort...

Dale O’Donnell in the Copsewood goal was at fault for allowing a long shot to pass between his shins to make the score 2-0 but I need to stress how dark it is at Sphinx Drive, as both the photographic and video evidence show, thus often making goalkeeping very difficult, especially at the far end from the changing facilities. Having kept goal a lot in my life, I will always sympathise with custodians. It’s what I do…

Almost Country Dancing...

Edwin Greaves brings me a ball to play with...

The toss and Cox...

Copsewood (why do people write Copeswood?) began brightly and a couple of sorties by the speedy Danny Fraser, Ryan Harkin and ex-Cageman Connoll Farrell caused home defenders Callum Burgess and Martin Hutchcox some harassment. Two rough fouls by Copses George Whitelaw and Matty Fowler on Ross Briscoe and Matt Brown offered free-kick opportunities for the hosts, which were squandered but as United Secretary Graham Wood, fingers warmed by the heat of his cigarette, spoke to me, the Copses lost possession in defence,  I panicked to press ‘Record’ on my camera, Briscoe tried to shoot but the ball fell at the feet of midfielder Richard Blythe, who poked a close range shot over the goal-line at the second attempt. 

1-0: Blythe...

In an effort to regain parity immediately, the Copses’ dead-ball expert Fraser cut inside Tommy Glasscoe on the left flank but his drive from 22 yards drifted too high. After Adamson’s first foul on O’Grady, the free-kick allowed Glasscoe a shot from 18 yards but it was messed up and Copsewood drove forward to win the first of two flag-kicks off the boot of Ben Vallance. Morris punched the ball out, Farrell’s volley from 19 yards deflected upwards but the meaty banana himself, Morris flew backwards to slap the ball down near his goal-line, from whence it was whacked clear by a home defender. Between Adamson’s two cards, both as yellow as Morris’ wardrobe (the third was as red as a United jersey) Hutchcox’s partial grab on Farrell earned him a caution too, albeit for his first offence but Adamson’s long walk to the dressing-room delayed United’s free-kick. Visiting skipper Civzelis clipped his 25 yard free-kick too high, following Hutchcox’s foul and O’Donnell soon fumbled a long Morris punt, before turning to grab the ball, as Lurker Brown hovered.

Eric Bloodaxe Mussa (see below...)

Civzelis (4): never shirked...

A very silly moment arrived after home skipper Chris Cox battled in midfield and a couple of challenges were allowed to go by the tall, angular referee until Cox was unceremoniously dumped on the soft turf. A Copse player attempted to pull Cox to his feet by his jersey, which was unwise and a few arguments ensued but fair play to Cox, he simply sat and didn’t react. Morris fell to the ground to prevent Whitelaw from getting onto a miscued Farrell shot, before Copse midfielder Liam Cairns, hurt, was replaced by Michael Healy. Briscoe then shuffled the ball left to Brown, who moved inside and shot from 35 yards but he looked as surprised as all of us as the horrified O’Donnell allowed the dropping ball to squirm between his socks into the net. Two errors by the guests and two goals for the hosts. Oops…

Dismissed: Adamson...

Shirt-swapping DURING the game...

2-0...

Brown netted with an assist from the goalie...

O’Grady, terrorising Fraser now, performed some trickery on the right and reached the byeline but Brown attempted a one-two with Blythe, which failed and the move fizzled out. Vallance’s left-side centre evaded O’Grady but Briscoe’s low shot was blocked by the Copses, before Briscoe’s turn around half-way, allowed O’Grady to pass left for Brown to make a one-on-one situation with O’Donnell. The goalie did well to knock away the striker’s flicked effort, only for O’Grady to benefit, sidestep a defender, fool O’Donnell and plant the ball into the left corner of goal from 10 yards. 

3-0: Tricky O'Grady...

Farrell saw a low shot deflected after a United corner had been cleared, then Brown’s diagonal pass from left to right led to four turns by O’Grady on the hapless Fraser but Briscoe was presumably penalised for a push as he headed the winger’s cross goalwards. Still game, driven on by Civzelis, Copses had another free-kick chance and I believe Glasscoe received a caution around this time. Farrell’s free-kick from 27 yards was touched over the horizontal bar by the safety-minded Morris and the half ended moments after the guests wasted their flag-kick.

The Copsewood coaches were unimpressed by the referee’s decisions, Fowler had survived without a caution, it was remarkable that the score was 3-0 at the interval and The Cagemen replaced Glasscoe with Pierre Moudime, who would link up dangerously in the second period with O’Grady. It was cold, Sphinx Drive continued to make one believe one was standing in a field in Siberia and I chatted to Muzi Nduna, who looked uncomfortable warming up in such bleak surroundings.

O’Grady had an early chance to shoot after the break but he fell at 18 yards and Briscoe’s subsequent shot was weak to O’Donnell. Moudime’s long leg not only kept the ball in play on one occasion, he wrapped it like a python around the ball to win a tackle too and it was his long ball forward which allowed Brown to attack at inside-right but be denied by the advancing O’Donnell. Gift Mussa made a bullish rush forward but the ball bounced off him for a goal-kick, as O’Donnell challenged, then a rather sliced delivery from the right by Brown (OK Matt, a measured long pass…) was collected out on the left by Briscoe, who tricked an opponent and was fouled near the byeline by Whitelaw. Blythe grabbed the ball and fired a low penalty into the net to O’Donnell’s right. 4-0 and the Copses were reeling again…

4-0...

Blythe's penalty...

Kai Williams replaced the limping Briscoe for United and after smart play by O’Grady and Moudime, the bursting forth Mussa was crudely upended by the beaten Kyle Barnett, who was rightly booked. Fowler was still keeping clear of a yellow card though as his temper rose but it was Copsewood who tried the next shot, when the ball was headed out by the home defence and Civzelis drove his 19 yarder past the left upright. Following a left-side centre a shot dribbled across the goalmouth after a deflection for Morris to collect and the hosts made their guest pay with a fifth goal. Brown took a header from Cox, fed Williams to his left, the forward left a defender in his wake and audaciously clipped home a low shot past O’Donnell with the outside of his left boot. I hadn’t realised it was Williams from where I stood and incorrectly commentated that Nduna had replaced Briscoe and thus scored… Apologies to Williams…

5-0: Williams...

Brown maybe ought to have passed the ball following a quick United free-kick, before O’Grady was wildly floored by Fowler, who escaped cautions for the both the foul and the dissent which followed. Referees, eh? His name was Fowler and he wasn’t booked? I liked that… Sean Gaffney had appeared for the visitors as a substitute and he went close to a consolation goal for his team but Farrell had also gone close in the same attack. Morris had to get down quickly to his right to push aside Farrell’s shot through a crowded penalty-box and when the ball was set up by Harkin for Gaffney to strike, the ‘keeper turned the resulting rising drive over the goal-frame. After Fowler had not been booked, Brown then received a yellow card for a simple foul, again highlighting the inconsistency shown by officials. Soon Moudime set off on a run into the right side of the penalty-area,  displaying a third type of wing-play, simply bustling past and through defenders, before rapping an acute shot off the outside of the near post.

O'Grady: like a marionette...

A pass by Nduna, then fine play by O’Grady on the right side of the 18 yard box left Fowler hopelessly beaten, O’Donnell too and the winger passed inside to Blythe, who could hardly miss from a few yards out to complete a hat-trick and it was 6-0.

6-0...

...and Blythe has three...

A brilliant nutmeg by Moudime on Civzelis made me smile, O’Grady and Blythe worked a short corner routine and O’Grady’s delivery flew across the goalmouth then with Mussa bulldozing in midfield, United won possession, O’Grady fed Brown on the right but the striker blazed high and wide of the near post from 18 yards. O’Grady fed Moudime again on the right though, the right-back raced into the danger area and passed inside for his mate, allowing O’Grady to swivel and fire a low drive into the bottom right corner of the net. 7-0 would soon become 8-0…

7-0...

...& a second for O'Grady...

Mussa passed to O’Grady on the right, he was watched like a hawk by Barnett, who was then bamboozled twice and left on his heels, as the winger moved to the right byeline, centred low and there was Williams from close range to rap the ball high into the net.

8-0 & a brace for Williams...

Nduna was first cautioned, then picked up the ball on the left side of the penalty-box from a short corner ruse and smacked the 9th goal past O’Donnell, who really was looking dejected by this time. 

9-0: Nduna this time...

Worse was to arrive for Copsewood in the final seconds, when Nduna released the ball to O’Grady, whose trickery on the 18 yard line led to a pass for Moudime on the right yet again, from whence the full-back swept a fine centre onto Brown’s head and the ball dropped into the bottom left corner of the net, with the beaten O’Donnell unbelieving. A Downing Street scoreline: 10…

10-0...

...& two for Brown...

A 19th century word meaning to practise witchcraft could sum up my influence on this game. The Copsewood Secretary, a decent bloke, saw me arrive and reckoned with me there, his team had no chance. Errors, a dismissal, missed chances and10-0? Hmm, perhaps I was the hex…

The Bodging realises what's at stake...

In truth, as well as 11-man United played at times against 10-man Copsewood, the visitors were always lively and really, if one removes the mistakes and the dismissal, things would surely have been SO different. Perhaps… 

For United, Blythe scored a memorable, if straight-forward trio of goals, O’Grady was dangerous, despite some odd late passes, Moudime was dashing and the central defenders were assured, although Farrell fought desperately to get a goal against his former team. Vallance was assured and sensible at left-back. Fowler and Barnett had to battle against adversity for the visitors and Civzelis was creative on occasions but the pacy forwards were always good to watch. One player though, was power personified… For an hour, Gift Mussa was in constant midfield combat, deep in the trenches of ball-winning and tackling but during the final half-hour, he took on the mantle of, and then rampaged like the 10th century Norseman Eric Bloodaxe, bludgeoning forward and leaving enemies in his wake, like he was leaving a shield-wall to thrust home an advantage… He was immense. I liked that. 

It’s what he does…

TEAMS:

COVENTRY UNITED:

Richard Morris, Tommy Glasscoe, Ben Vallance, Richard Blythe, Martin Hutchcox, Callum Burgess, Josh O’Grady, Gift Mussa, Ross Briscoe, Matt Brown, Chris Cox (Capt).

SUBS:

Pierre Moudime, Kai Williams, Brian Ndlovu, Muzi Nduna, David Allen.

COVENTRY COPSEWOOD:

Dale O’Donnell, George Whitelaw, Stuart Adamson, Craig Civzelis (Capt), Kyle Barnett, Matty Fowler, Reece Blackmore, Liam Cairns, Ryan Harkin, Connoll Farrell, Danny Fraser.

SUBS:

Michael Healy, Sean Gaffney, Ismail Said, Mason Aldridge, Simon Harris.