BARTESTREE FC 3-0 LEAMINGTON HIBERNIAN: LIGHT-HEARTED MATCH REPORT & IMAGES...

Depleted Hibs Totally Up the Tree…

Bartestree FC 3-0 Leamington Hibernian

Bartestree is a really decent set up and the club produces such a good match programme for a Midland League 3 outfit. One has to admire the ambition and support the club surely has too which should take itself higher in the ‘pyramid’. However, three things about this match were entirely disappointing. Firstly Hibs could only muster eleven players to make the trip to Herefordshire and two of those were dismissed by the referee; secondly ‘Tree failed to take any real advantage of a couple of wounded Hibs and then a two-man advantage and indeed struggled to find their form; but lastly the officials hardly covered themselves with glory, in truth…

THE REF SEES JONES, RIGHT & MAKES A MENTAL NOTE TO SEND HIM OFF LATER...

A goal-less opening half of huff and puff, during which visiting centre-back James Corrigan was outstanding, despite plainly hurting following a heavy knock, was notable for some wasteful, wayward shooting by the ‘Tree and only two shots by Hibs, both by Daniel Lucas, an ex-Coventry United player I recall from a few seasons back. The solid Hibs defenders kept top ‘Tree scorer Louis Mann at bay with a mixture of sheer belligerence and often basic meanness. Although the hosts attempted to pass the ball, the Hibs players mostly sat back to retain energy, knowing that they could not be substituted of course.

WATTS (GOALIE): "WE ARE BOTH WEARING GREEN THOUGH REF..."
REF: "NO WORRIES, ALL 3 OF US ARE WEARING BLACK..."

BUSY BENCH...

LONELY BENCH...

After the break though, a quick Stuart New goal was quickly followed by a red card for Hibs’ Jones, a resulting penalty goal for the ‘Tree by Mann and then a dismissal for visiting leading scorer Ainsley Francis for what amounted to a head-butt. A number of spectators hadn’t by then returned from their half-time break and were shocked to learn that Bartestree were 2-0 ahead and facing nine men… Oh, woe is a half time pint and sadness is a long interval pee… Subsequently, Lucas dropped back to help the ailing Corrigan in defence, alongside the hurt and bearded Ben O’Driscoll and the strongly built Neil Guest who on one occasion in the opening half threw the ball at a linesman with great accuracy and received, er, nothing in the way of rebut… The assistant reacted not at all, whereas the referee presumably failed to notice… Spectators became irritated, Hibs weren’t often very harassed, although at least Bartestree’s New, Levi Ellis and the impressive Mark Hibbard forced Hibs’ ‘keeper Jack Marshall into four saves between them. It was only just prior to added time (and there wasn’t much of that, surprisingly…) that home replacement Nick Weaver netted low past Marshall to spare one or two of the Bartestree blushes, of which there were probably many…

NEW KICKS OFF...

A Lewis Clarke free-kick and a good New shot from inside-right both cleared the Hibs crossbar early on, following a foul on Mann by Corrigan and a pass by Alex Neale respectively, before New drove well wide on the slippery surface, the result of rain on a firm pitch. After Guest surely shoved Mann over just outside the 18 yard box which brought no free-kick, Ellis also drove too high for the ‘Tree from 16 yards and Mann dragged an effort off target. Corrigan was injured at around this point but at least Hibs were given a defensive breather by the break in play and indeed Lucas struck a low shot in a rare Leamington attack but home ‘keeper and skipper Elliot Watts fell to smother the attempt.

MANN SUFFERS A WARDROBE MALFUNCTION...

JONES, LUCAS & SHEMWELL...

Ellis was moving past opponents with ease at times for the ‘Tree but his end product was generally lacking although he did assist Mann for a shot which was driven too high from 22 yards and after Marshall palmed down a shot from inside-left by left-back Jack Shemwell and no home player had reacted to the rebound, Ellis again drove a shot over the high hedge. For Hibs, a Jones corner on the right was cleared and allowed Lucas a 25 yard shot which cleared the goal-frame, Guest chucked the ball at a linesman with great accuracy but soon, the ‘Tree managed a late first-half flurry. First a short corner allowed Neale to get in a near post shot which Marshall collected and then New pounded a shot so high that a rugby conversion was brought to mind…

O'DRISCOLL & MANN SPOT A NORTH KOREAN MISSILE OVER THE MALVERNS...

HACKETT: HARD AS NAILS...

The interval arrived, the rain had held off mostly and people strolled away in order to miss the beginning of the second period. Hibs stayed at the side of the pitch, maybe to save energy, but it was always going to be a tough second period for the men in green and white and it would quickly become so much tougher. Apart from the poor ‘Tree finishing and the stubborn Hibs defending, there had been decent contributions for the ‘Tree in the first period by Shemwell and Ellis, also some unselfish front-running by Mann and New but Hibbard and Neale in particular had looked cute on the ball on occasions, whilst Tom Burroughs had done the fetching and carrying in midfield like a World War 1 runner, taking supplies to the front trenches in round trips. Jones had battled for Hibs but he and his tall skipper Sean Wilson were rarely attacking factors for the visitors, who were languishing next to bottom in the league, compared to Bartestree’s third spot. 

CORRIGAN HURTS...

...BUT CARRIES ON WITH A GRIMACE...

THE SEATED GENTLEMAN INVITED ME TO BARTESTREE.
I HAD NO IDEA HE HAD SUCH DIFFICULTY WITH TYING HIS BOOTLACES...

HALF-TIME: A GOOD TIME TO CHECK ONE'S SCROTUM (RIGHT)...

Straight after the break though, things began to improve for the ‘Tree, to worsen for the Hibs and to get very hairy for the referee. Burroughs found himself at the left byeline following a Hibs clearance and some groundwork by Shemwell twice and Neale, before the midfielder’s kind of awkward right boot pass across the goalmouth was bundled into the net by the glabrous, bearded, undaunted New. And then the game exploded into unpleasantness… 

FRANCIS STARTS THE SECOND-HALF...

1-0...

NEW THE SCORER.
YEAH, I KNEW THE SCORER...

A set-piece was cleared by the guests but the referee spotted something out of the corner of an eye, amid some hollers from players and a few spectators alike and after a long pause, the official displayed a red card towards Jones, as well as a yellow one to the pillar-like Brendan Hackett, whose tackling had been hard since the start of the game. The caution might have been for arguing against the official’s decision I guess. The consequence of the dismissal was a spot-kick for the ‘Tree and Mann duly obliged, firing into the right corner of the net, although Marshall nearly got across to get a touch on the shot. Words were then passed between O’Driscoll and a couple of celebrating home players, illustrating the disgruntlement felt by the Leamington players…

A POSTURE, A RED CARD, A SHOCKED EXPRESSION & A PIGGED OFF GOALIE...

2-0: PENALTY BY MANN...

WHAT IS O'DRISCOLL SAYING (RIGHT)?

WATCH OUT LADS, HE'S A-COMIN' TO GET YA...

Soon afterwards Francis took exception presumably to Neale’s challenge and responded by rounding upon the slight ‘Tree midfielder and thrusting his head forth like he was heading for goal. Whether the butt landed it is unclear but after a small playground fracas, Francis too was red-carded, although the totally defensive Neale was surprisingly cautioned, maybe to becalm the already choppy waters a little… 

TROUBLE...

MILLING ABOUT...

WILSON (10) SPRINKLES STARDUST ON THE REFEREE...

IT DOESN'T WORK THOUGH & FRANCIS IS SENT OFF...

A headed clearance by the wholehearted Hib Kieran McAndrews was half-volleyed from 20 yards by New and only an agile leap and tip over his crossbar by Marshall prevented a third goal for the hosts. Following the sensible withdrawal of the influential Neale, replacing him with Austin Thomas, a Hibbard shot was deflected over the crossbar by the guests’ Guest (is that right?), before an Ellis drive was pushed aside by the diving Marshall and another Hibbard effort rose just over the left angle of upright and crossbeam. Thomas sliced a shot well wide, New and Mann were replaced by, er, new men (is that right, also?) Nick Weaver and Aaron Smith, before a left-side centre by Shemwell was fired at goal from 7 yards by Hibbard but Marshall fell to block that one.

WATTS: A MOSTLY REDUNDANT SECOND PERIOD...

...UNTIL (TEE-HEE) HE RECEIVES A CAUTION...

In a rare attack, Guest shot way too high for the visitors (was it something about that end of the ground? Were the players suffering from an attack of the Malverns?) and Watts, the home goalie was barged out of the way by O’Driscoll, the referee ignored it, Watts bellowed a few choice words at the linesman who had previously not offered any advice at all to the senior official and Watts was laughably cautioned. Finally though, as the hosts stumbled, erred and seemed to slow down a few times to an almost complete standstill in possession, Wilson contributed a shot for the visitors. Watts patted it down like he was being creative on ‘Bake Off’ and that was that for Hibs.

A PAIR OF DEFENSIVE BRICK SHITHOUSES...

A low Weaver shot was stopped by Marshall, a low Burroughs centre was missed in front of goal by Smith who admittedly was being challenged, a low volley by the elusive Ellis took a bad bounce and it appeared that the already fallen Marshall managed a glove on the ball which took the effort upwards and only just over the crossbar, or did it deflect off a defender beforehand? As the rather untidy affair was drawn to a close by the hassled referee, with so little extra time, considering the goal celebrations, injuries and stoppages for two dismissals and their discussions, Bartestree finally added a third goal and sent their supporters off to the bar in lighter moods. 

Ellis and Shemwell combined to feed Weaver on the left side of the penalty-box and Weaver wove inside to fire a clinical and low left footer past Marshall and into the far corner of the net. It was so simply scored that one wondered about the previous attempts by the ‘Trees…

3-0...

WEAVER THIS TIME...

Fair play to Lucas but especially the crocked Corrigan and also Guest and O’Driscoll, as well as Marshall for keeping the score down, although the efforts of Hackett and McAndrews cannot be understated. Solomon Bloomer earned his crust with some defensive midfield work late on but those early second period catastrophes had killed Leamington’s hopes of salvaging even a point…

NEALE IN RED, HACKETT ON GROUND & HIBBARD (8) AT THE END...

HIBS: BEATEN BUT NOT HAMMERED...

The hosts were certainly not anywhere near their best, according to the locals afterwards and Mann and Ellis will have more productive games in front of goal, certainly. Burroughs was positive throughout, Hibbard brought a wealth of experience to the team with his positional play and movement, Neale was neat in possession but the set-pieces were not too well executed on the whole and the shooting was often forgettable. Defenders Callum Omelasz and Shane Price were rarely troubled…

THE HANDSHAKE...

I had to move for the final minutes of the match due to a pair of dogs cavorting in front of the shelter, whilst their owners bobbed about in front of me with the animals’ leads being whipped about by their pets’ necks. Therefore, along with the two smoking lads on the rail nearby they created only a partial view of the last part of the encounter we had presumably turned up to watch…

MATCH PROGRAMME...

Ah, well, life eh?

TEAMS:

BARTESTREE FC:

ELLIOT WATTS (CAPT), LEWIS CLARKE, JACK SHEMWELL, CALLUM OMELASZ, SHANE PRICE, TOM BURROUGHS, ALEX NEALE, MARK HIBBARD, LOUIS MANN, LEVI ELLIS, STUART NEW.

SUBS:

AUSTIN THOMAS, AARON SMITH, NICK WEAVER, TOM DAVIES.

LEAMINGTON HIBERNIAN:

JACK MARSHALL, NEIL GUEST, BEN O’DRISCOLL, DAN LUCAS, JAMES CORRIGAN, KIERAN McANDREWS, AINSLEY FRANCIS, BRENDAN HACKETT, MICHAEL JONES, SEAN WILSON (CAPT), SOLOMON BLOOMER.

SUBS:

NONE…