COVENTRY UNITED PLAYER PROFILES: 15. BRIAN NDLOVU...

BRIAN NDLOVU: LEGEND & RATHER FORWARD…

Brian's gift from junior is a new pair of kiddie-boots...

Any nickname? 

Bizzasnypa11 but Kobe Ntim nicknamed me ‘The Beast’…

Previous Clubs? 

Highlanders Juniors FC (Zimbabwe), GNP Sports, Moto FC, Caludon FC, Terex FC, Kenilworth Town FC, Stratford Town ‘A’ FC, Young Warriors FC, Long Buckby AFC & Coventry Spartans…

Which pro-team do you support? 

I support football. If I had to pick one, I would say Real Madrid… 

Favourite all-time player? 

Ronaldo da Lima- ‘Big Ron’…

Favourite current player? 

Has to be Cristiano Ronaldo; he is the perfect specimen of a modern day footballer: right foot, left foot, heads, fast, skilful, talented, etc… 

That Messi as well is a big problem….

Whats your favourite bird? 

Chicken: it tastes so good…

If you could have any animal as a pet what would it be? 

An elephant or a killer whale…

Your most treasured sporting moment? 

So many of them, where can I start? I'm gonna run out of space so I will leave it there…

Your lowest sporting moment? The penalty-miss in the Final last year. Thanks again Josh O’Tricky for saving me! LOL…

Another low moment for Brian...

Anything else you would like to share? 

Turned down a professional offer from Highlanders FC and Amazulu FC in Zimbabwe at 17 to come to England…

Sphinx Drive was also my home ground before, where I scored a hell of a lot of goals… 

Brian has a watch now...

THE MOWDOG COMMENTS…

BIZZASNYPA11? Is that a nickname or Brian’s passport number? 

I reckon it means: 'Busy Sniper wearing number 11'...

The Beast? Hmm, maybe ‘The Messiah’ is looking a reality now for the chosen one…

Brian joins Pierre's Glee Club...

Previous teams include Moto? Isn’t that a motorway service area? Did Brian play on the hard shoulder and is that where Pierre hurt his?

Real Madrid… Oh, dear. Modric I like, Isco too, but Bale? Can’t take to him…

Another Fatti Ronaldo fan, the dentists’ dream…

But Cristiano? 

One of my daughters used to work at Birmingham’s Hyatt Hotel and when Manure United stayed one time, Ronaldo was in a queue to be served by Wendy at Reception. The chap she was serving dropped his wallet, I believe, unaware that Ronaldo had picked it up for him; Wendy told the guy: “The gentleman behind you has your wallet, Sir…” The fellow turned and simply froze, completely dumbstruck, as Ronaldo offered the wallet. Other players fell about, apparently… 

Messi is a problem? Why so? Too tiny?

Favourite bird is a chicken because it tastes so good? 

Good job Brian didn’t choose a blue-footed booby…

Actually, that might have been an interesting choice…

For a pet, Brian would choose an elephant, or a killer whale? 

What??? Not a Springbok?

Surely as The Messiah, it should have been a donkey to ride into town upon?

Ah, donkeys: aka Birmingham City defenders…

Brian has too many treasured moments? He should be so lucky…

Worst moment was that penalty last season? 

Last seconds of a cup-final and the Knowle ‘keeper didn’t even get the opportunity to be a hero… 

Brian was crestfallen. 

Crucifixion was the only option after that… 

Brian checks that his arse is Dakouri-ready...

Brian turned down professional offers to come to England, where players like Ashley Young, Jamie Vardy and Gary Cahill have been internationals? There’s a joke here, somewhere…

Brian explains to Pierre: "C'est un chapeau, D'Artagnan..."

Why is it, when Pierre is about, smiling is banned?
(Gift is only a kid, and doesn't understand adult values yet...)

Sphinx Drive was lucky for Brian. Let’s hope that continues…

Young Warriors, 50 goals, Division 3 Midland Combination top goalscorer, 2009-10… 

Old warrior, Young Warrior...

And WHO THE HELL IS STEWART, BRIAN???

He IS The Messiah, he's NOT a very naughty boy… 

Brian's just seen Gift's blue-footed booby...

Cheers, STEWART…