2013-14 & ROLLS ROYCE LEISURE FC WIN THE LEAGUE AT NEWHALL UNITED...

Rolls Royce Resilience Reaps Reward

Newhall United 1 Derby Rolls Royce Leisure 3 

(Midland Regional Alliance Premier Division, 2013-2014)

It could not be said that The Royce coasted to this victory at Newhall, whose players were clearly combative and desperate to rust their guests’ engines, but the visitors took three of their goal chances, whereas Newhall squandered some of theirs, although the busier goalkeeper was definitely not Rob Woodard of The Royce. Two of The Royce’s goals stemmed from goalkeeping errors and the third was a gentle header but the second period was understandably scrappy, despite the decent surface, as The Royce players, no doubt impatient for the final whistle so they could begin their celebrations, became a trifle careless. 

They certainly enjoyed the receipt of the trophy, the keepsakes and the attention, for who wouldn’t? But I was puzzled that there were so few attendees from Melbourne, who might have secured the title, if Newhall had managed to win the match. Matt Brian of Dynamo Tweeted me asking for the score and after I had replied, he congratulated The Royce, which impressed me. Once again, The Royce were so well served by their full-backs, with Kieran Lynch working particularly well with Alex Marshall.

The early skirmishes had been in The Royce’s favour, but only just and the hosts then began to assert themselves in midfield, with Nick McInulty marauding about, finding space and making life tough, in particular for the ever-willing Royce skipper, Ash Foster. Odd that both skippers were called Foster; maybe they should set up a chain of men’s wear stores called Foster Brothers?

The referee officiated at a restricted jog, mostly along a straight line, which stretched to 20 yards either side of the half-way line. My deceased father would have covered more ground at the age of eighty, despite suffering from two very dodgy knees and glaucoma. 

A 35 yard free-kick shot by Ash Foster led to a sloppy Rolls goal. The hefty home goalie fell left to save the low shot but like a bear unable to grasp an escaping chipmunk, he lost possession and Davy Hamson, sniffing reward, poached a goal, netting his gift from a yard or so.

DAVY HAMSON SCORES FOR ROYCE...

...& IT'S 0-1...

Newhall were living a little dangerously with some naughty challenges but the referee seemed as unmoved as a rat in a Somme trench. Suddenly though, a long boot upfield by The Royce saw Baldwin race from goal like a Saxon defending his farm from pillaging Vikings, only to be beaten by the bounce to the horror of his fellow defenders, 19 yards from goal. Gordon and Marshall simply looked aghast and Marshall benefited, rolling a gentle ground shot into the empty net, as he fell backwards like a reveller in Broad Street, Birmingham, following a night out. 0-2 and possibly the game was over as a contest.

ALEX MARSHALL FOR 0-2...

The half came to an end when United’s Danny Wright badly sliced a volley from 22 yards, after Aliguma had headed clear a Newhall free-kick; it landed on the byeline, sending up chalk as it bounced 18 yards wide. My acquaintance Colin, from Ravenstone  (also now sadly deceased) had missed goal two because he was buying a hot drink for a friend and he was to miss goal three too after the interval for he was in deep conversation with his mate about the make-up of Steps 1-4 for the following season. See? It pays to video sometimes…  

GARY HAMSON: LEEDS UNITED LEGEND: WELL BALANCED...

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU'VE LOST TWO OF THE SUBSTITUTES?"

That third goal, which effectively won the title for the Engines emanated from a simple free-kick from downtown by midfielder Brandon Gwinnett, whose work ethic reminded me of a Black Market operator during the Second World War. And no, I can’t explain that, but he did seem to be into everything. Troy Black won the ball which was travelling towards him, his back to goal, left of centre and his, er, ‘cushioned’ header across the 6-yard box bounced gently into the far corner of goal, with Baldwin scrabbling, scrambling and scurrying in vain. More importantly, Black smiled…

TROY BLACK HAS MADE IT 0-3...

Newhall’s James Ward was drifting more to the left flank and finally, his efforts brought a reward, however scant, for his team. His control led to the ball rolling inside for Wright, who drove a fine, if speculative shot goalwards from a good 35 yards and Woodard, no doubt deceived, could only watch as the effort swirled and dropped inside his right upright. Wright loved it, celebrated it, but then, after Black was cautioned for an unwise and careless tackle, things soured.

FINE STRIKE BY DANNY WRIGHT...

...& IT'S 1-3...

Feeling that the game wasn’t lost yet, no doubt, Newhall’s tackles became more vigorous, then skipper Richard Foster headed well off target from a free-kick, following inept Royce defending. Suddenly a couple of really dubious challenges flew in from home players at the far side of the pitch from where I was standing, but the second of them, presumably by Nick McInulty, caused real controversy, animating The Royce manager. He could have been auditioning for a part as a windmill in a new Dutch soap opera but the referee, for once not having to move too far to officiate, chose to dismiss the flapping boss from the playing area. Where was he supposed to go? If he had been ‘sent to the grandstand’, he would never have been found again, for the dereliction there made Lye Town’s grandstand look like Villa Park… 

As the bemused manager threaded his way through the undergrowth like a badger finding somewhere to deposit its droppings, it did appear that McInulty, possibly, was shown a yellow card but I could well have been mistaken as to the identity of the culprit, who was a good distance away from the referee at the time he brandished the sweaty piece of yellow paper. How unusual for the official to be so far from an incident...

The episode which placed the lid on a poor refereeing performance arrived when Richard Foster so clearly fell and blocked a 20 yard Royce shot with his arms. The assistant flagged immediately but I couldn’t tell whether the incident was inside the penalty-box. However, the referee ignored his linesman completely anyway, as if the assistant was a person selling the ‘Big Issue’ in Solihull’s town-centre. The Royce players were incensed, the official shook his head and waved a finger like a teacher who has blamed the wrong child and doesn’t have the decency or good nature to admit to his flawed analysis. 

Royce’s efforts were more evident than their skills on the day, but who cared? They were champions and they enjoyed their fun-time, despite some beer-inspired bad natured language in front of children by two or three local lads on the sideline.  

Well done Royce for the success, also well done Newhall for not capitulating. Thanks to the hosts for making me welcome too, once I found the ground…

Teams:

Newhall:  Simon Baldwin, Damon Willday, Luke Harris; Nick McInulty, Josh Pearson, Richard Foster (Capt); Ash Riddell, Danny Wright, Mark Kirkland, James Ward, Matt Draycott.

Subs: Richard Draycott, Nathan Smith, Adam Stockdale.

Rolls Royce:  Rob Woodard, Owen Brown, Kieran Lynch; Dylan Place, Peter Aliguma, Brandon Gwinnett; Troy Black, Ash Foster (Capt), Davy Hamson, Sean Gordon, Alex Marshall.

Subs: Adrian Hall, Richard Norman, Nathan Daley.